Monday, September 26, 2005

No-Neck roommates discovered





It was discovered today that betsy and rebecca have no necks. After close scrutiny of several photos, it is determined that no one is really sure how their heads are attached to thier bodies, since no sign of a neck is even shown. Several close friends deny having ever seen betsy or rebecca with a neck, and when asked to comment, the two roommates could only make the noise of someone who's laranyx and vocal cords have been removed.

Gross close-up of no-necks, if you can even stand to look at it:


Dustin turns into cookie-baking Rasputin at midnight




During a recent sleepover, Dustin Condrin kept alluding to the fact that something strange was going to happen to him after midnight. Everyone was a little worried that it might be something dangerous or gross, but not one of the participants in the sleepover had any idea that the exciting secret would be that he would turn into a cookie-baking Rastputin at the stroke of midnight! Sure enough, as soon as midnight hit, the air in the apartment began smelling of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies, and Dustin/Rasputin came out dressed handsomely in a green Starbucks apron and smartly curled mustache. He deftly passed out cookies to the pajamaed masses, with the skill of a true Siberian holy man and crafty manipulator of the Imperial Family.

To test that Dustin was really Rasputin, betsy made sure to poison his cookie, but he ate it and seemed fine. So it appears that he really was Rasputin.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Emily and Paul sit down during MISSON ART WALK




Paul Gruwell and Emily Cox had the nerve to sit down on Saturday during the Mission Art Walk, illiciting dirty looks from several local hipsters who, despite the tightness of their pants, were still able to remain standing and walking during the entire art experience.

"Thats why they call it an Art WALK" said one curator. "You come to the Mission and then walk around and look at art. I don't know what those guys' problem is. It doesn't seem that hard to figure out."

When faced with these indisputable facts, Paul and Emily remained unrepentant and immobile. Emily defiantly stated that not only was she not going to walk around, but she was going to keep her eyes closed to make sure she REALLY didn't see any art. Paul's only excuse was that he just likes to sit down and cross his legs sometimes.